Living in Exile

Ever been homesick?

In 1989 I lived in Mexico City, Mexico for an entire summer and attended the Instituto Tecnológico Autónomo de México, or ITAM. I was there as part of a summer mission trip with eleven other students from West Georgia College. I grew up in a small town of about 1,000 people and landed in a metropolitan city with over 15,000,000! It was HUGE and different to say the least. However, the people, food, experiences, and culture all made for an opportunity that I will always treasure. But on Sunday nights every two weeks, I got homesick because that was the one night that we got to call home. (Obviously, this is before the days of instant communication that we now live.) Hearing my parents' and sister's voices made me long for home. I would ache for the rest of the evening. However, I knew that despite how I longed to go home, it wasn't going to happen until the mission was over.

I distinctly remember feeling homesick the morning Carole died. A part of me was gone. A real, tangible part of me was missing and I wanted so desperately to be with Carole. I didn't wish for her to be here. Instead, I wanted to be where she was. Home.

Over the next few days, weeks, and months, I was consoled, given books to read, and reminded of many scripture verses offering hope and comfort. One of those verses was Jeremiah 29:11.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." ESV

I never imagined my life without Carole so I had a difficult time with this verse. In my mind, welfare, future, and hope all included Carole. It wasn't until recently that I began to rethink this verse in the context of verses 4-7 and 10. 

"Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce. Take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give your daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease. But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the LORD on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare." 

"For thus says the LORD: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you My promise and bring you back to this place."

I'm sure that these Israelites were homesick as some of their people were home in Jerusalem. Yet, these Israelites were in exile in Babylon and then it dawned on me. God's word to them was to continue living....build, plant, marry, multiply, contribute, serve, and pray. When the time was complete, God would fulfill His promise and come back to take them home to Jerusalem.

So, what does this have to do with grief and healing?

According to Philippians 3:20, our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. Until then we're living in exile. The lesson for me is to continue living until I'm called Home....love people, enjoy relationships, enjoy God's creation, work, serve, contribute, and pray. 

Will it be hard? Probably. But God is faithful to keep His promises. 

  

So, if you're hurting, going through a difficult time, or grieving, be encouraged. Keep living. It may be hard to do, but keep doing it one day at a time. Here are some of the things I'm doing:

• Talking to Jesus
• Surrounding myself with a great cloud of witnesses that know the LORD
• Confiding in others my feelings
• Expressing my feelings through journaling
• Asking others for help and/or prayer
• Looking up and moving forward one day at a time
• Giving myself grace 
• Accepting God's grace

Don't give up. God hasn't. He does have a plan for welfare, a future, and a hope for you and me.